Wait… What?

Posted on August 20, 2010 by leighton

I absolutely love a good non sequitur, partially because I enjoy employing Latin, but mostly because they seem to always garner the same reaction from a large number of people. Throw a good non sequitur at someone and they’ll usually miss it for second (and even start to respond), then pause and look at you quizzically, and finally respond with a universal, “Wait . . . what?” It’s fun throwing people off, unless, of course, you happen to be the one smacked in the face with a wonderful non sequitur. Continue reading →

Posted in Stories | Tagged , , , , , | 1 Comment

Up North (from Down South)

Posted on August 18, 2010 by leighton

For a time, I had to travel somewhat regularly when I worked for a company in Nashville, I mentioned before that I was born and raised in the South, but not being saddled with the prejudices which seem to plague a few of my fellow Southerners, I enjoyed meeting people with different backgrounds and perspectives. True, I greatly enjoyed returning home, mostly to get back to my family, but also to get away from people who claimed I talk funny. Continue reading →

Posted in Stories | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

They’re Everywhere

Posted on August 16, 2010 by leighton

It was summer and I was taking classes at Austin Peay. I had finished my last class of the day and was looking forward to decompressing at home. Packing a semester’s worth into a few weeks resulted in long classes and, while I did and still enjoy learning, I liked that I was done for the day. Little did I realize that I was about to be taught an important lesson by an unlikely teacher. Continue reading →

Posted in Stories | Tagged , , , , , | 6 Comments

Salmon Pants

Posted on August 13, 2010 by leighton

I’ve written before that I never had a chance at being cool. It was mostly my own fault, but there was one aspect of my not coolness that was not my fault: my wardrobe. True, it changed as I got older and had more say in what was bought, but for many years I was at the mercy of what my mom thought would look good on me. This wouldn’t be too much of a problem except my mom has a . . . unique fashion sense. Continue reading →

Posted in Stories | Tagged , , , , | 8 Comments

Round and Round

Posted on August 11, 2010 by leighton

I’ve lived in the South my entire life. While there are many Southern clichés that do not apply to me, I still exhibit a few. I have a light southern drawl, I enjoy iced tea, and can be found fixin’ to do things. One stereotypical Southern pastime I’ve managed to avoid is becoming a NASCAR fan (and I’ll never forgive one of my brothers-in-law for giving in and becoming one himself). It’s just not my thing. I suppose there is some skill involved, but for me, watching a race on TV is just watching a bunch of people turn left indefinitely, going round and round with no discernible purpose. I realize this puts me in the minority in Tennessee and might make some angry with me, but I can’t help it. Besides,  I have plenty of other things I can be fixin’ to do that are more interesting to me. Continue reading →

Posted in Stories | Tagged , , , | 5 Comments

Toss it Out

Posted on August 9, 2010 by leighton

I’m a hoarder. Not the type that needs an intervention from Oprah or any other reality (?) show, but a hoarder nonetheless. I have great difficulty letting go of the things I’ve accumulated over the years and often attach more sentiment to some objects than they deserve. This often causes problems for me, especially when I’m attempting to de-clutter my office at home. Continue reading →

Posted in Stories | Tagged , , , | 4 Comments

Airbrushed Nightmare

Posted on August 6, 2010 by leighton

I remember my first date with my girlfiend (still not a typo, still a story for another time). Of course, she wasn’t my girfiend yet, or even my girlfriend for that matter. We had gone to see Wayne’s World, which sadly was part of an elaborate plan I made to ensure we had something to talk about (it’s an infinitely quotable movie). I needn’t have worried. Continue reading →

Posted in Stories | Tagged , , | 2 Comments

On the Phone

Posted on August 4, 2010 by leighton

Phones are great and terrible things. They often take too much of our time, but they can be extremely useful. I’ve had a love-hate relationship with phones as long as I’ve been using them. They provide a form of communication that is both distant and intimate at the same time. They can also create confusion. Many conversations I’ve had on them would have been much simpler in person.  Continue reading →

Posted in Stories | Tagged , , | 1 Comment

I’m Cool Like That

Posted on August 2, 2010 by leighton

I’m not really a cool guy. Never have been, at least not in the way most people mean it. I’ve made my peace with it, but I used to try very, very hard to be cool. I usually failed quite spectacularly. Even if I managed to get one aspect of coolness correct, my inherit (weird? goofy? just not like anybody else?) nature had a way of spoiling it in ways that would have been obvious to anybody but me.

Continue reading →

Posted in Stories | Tagged , , , | 2 Comments

S.A.L.

Posted on July 30, 2010 by leighton

When you have a really good friend in Middle School, you assume you’ll always be friends. Of course, you’re probably wrong (as you are about most of the assumptions you make in Middle School). I still remember when my best friend and I had a falling out. It was in seventh grade and started, as these things often do, over a Girl. Continue reading →

Posted in Stories | Tagged , , | 7 Comments