The Breaking Point

Posted on November 22, 2010 by leighton

I’ve had my fair share of relationships (some would argue I’ve had more than my fair share). Most of them ended even though I didn’t want them to, which is really just a way of saying I got dumped more often than not. That’s not to imply I was never the one who initiated the breakup. I broke off relationships for various reasons (and as I got older, those reason became far more, um, reasonable). Whatever that reason might be, I always knew exactly what it was. If I told the girl or woman I was dating that “it just wasn’t working out,” I could also explain why. It’s been over a movie only twice. Continue reading →

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The Way it Wasn’t

Posted on November 19, 2010 by leighton

As graduation loomed nearer and the reality of the end sunk in, many in the Class of ’91 abruptly (and radically) altered their habits. For the most part, social structures and standings faded and the soon to graduate seniors interacted with others in ways they never had before. I watched as several chose to ignore years of mistreatment and pretend good friendships with the very classmates who mistreated them. Everyone seemed to want to go out on a high note. I also wanted to go out on a high, but because I saw the new situation as the pleasant fiction it was, mine was in a slightly different key. Continue reading →

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Men Are Scum

Posted on November 17, 2010 by leighton

It was an ordinary day at Northeast High School. The second bell between classes was about to ring and all the students rushed to make it to class before it did. Well, all but one. As other students darted around me and hurried to clear the halls, I lay on the floor doubled over in pain. My two books were jumbled on the floor surrounded by a few errant pages of college ruled notebook paper. My hands clutched my crotch, the source of the pain. The bell rang and I was alone. I rolled to my side and struggled to get up, but it was no use as all my energy had left. I thought it couldn’t possibly get worse. Then I noticed the pair of well shined shoes a foot from my nose. I looked up at the Assistant Principal standing over me. Continue reading →

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How I Got the Worst Nickname of My Life

Posted on November 15, 2010 by leighton

There’s a certain card game that I have difficulty with. It’s not the game itself that bothers me, in fact, I actually enjoy playing it (at least when I remember I don’t actually hate it). The problem stems from only one aspect of the game, and that one percent of the game often ruins the entire experience for me. It’s a word uttered when a player is close to winning and is left holding a single card. The thing is, when that player shouts, “UNO!” I think it’s in reference to me. Continue reading →

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What’s in a Name

Posted on November 12, 2010 by leighton

Being saddled with a name that nearly everyone either mispronounces or misspells at first seems to have made me keenly aware of how annoying it can be for someone to get your name wrong. I try to pay close attention when I’m meeting people and will even seek their guidance and approval in pronouncing or spelling their names correctly. It’s a big deal to me to get it right and not rely on an easier to pronounce nickname. I really only have trouble when I call tech support.
Continue reading →

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Honey, I Need You

Posted on November 10, 2010 by leighton

Like most married couples, Chrisie and I have developed our own language over the years. We may speak English, but certain words and phrases have meanings unique to our relationship. Some are recognizable to others and I imagine other couples would have little difficulty sussing their meaning. Some seem at fist familiar, but take on a deeper context. Some, of course, a pretty straightforward, such as when one of us says, “Honey, I need you.” What follows, however, is rarely straightforward. Continue reading →

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So That’s What It’s Like

Posted on November 8, 2010 by leighton

I sat in my truck in one of the many quick oil change places in Clarksville. I only vaguely paid attention to the calls of, “Ready on bay 1,” and the gentle rocking of the truck as they opened the hood and checked the fluids. I was about to ponder the usage of the word “instant” in relation to oil changes when a very nice car pulled in to the bay beside me. I watched as the worker directing the driver subtly motioned to his co-workers. The one who just opened my hood quickly moved in toward the new customer. All work on my vehicle stopped. I peered into the new car and it all came clear.

Continue reading →

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Okay, Cry

Posted on November 5, 2010 by leighton

As I write this, it’s been nearly a year and a half since our son, Jackson, was born. He came almost a month early, but the delivery was smooth and we thought everything was fine. We thought. I was so excited to see my son that I didn’t notice the look of concern on the nurse’s face, or how quickly she hurried with him from the room. He spent most of his first week of life kept safe in a plastic box with an unnatural number of wires and tubes connected to him. Bad news seemed to come with each moment and each new day, but the one thing that wouldn’t come (for me at least) was tears. Continue reading →

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My Imagination (Part 2)

Posted on November 3, 2010 by leighton

You can read Part 1 here.

Sadly, My Imagination is just as (over) active today as it ever was. I realize it’s my fault for letting My Imagination run wild, but I often can’t seem to escape its snare. Usually it’s not a big deal, because I realize that I’m getting carried away. Of course, sometimes, even though I know that, I still can’t help it. It makes for extremely embarrassing (or funny depending on your viewpoint) situations such as one I experienced one afternoon at the Post Office. Continue reading →

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My Imagination

Posted on November 1, 2010 by leighton

Once you get to know me, it’s pretty obvious that I have an (over) active imagination. It comes in handy when my daughter would like a story, but most of the time it can be annoying. It sometimes runs away and creates intricate situations which I describe in my mind so well that they seem suddenly plausible (they usually aren’t). Sometimes it’s the normal fear every father experiences when contemplating unlikely scenarios with his family, but other times my imagination goes into hyperdrive and causes issues. Continue reading →

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